10 LESSONS FROM THE MONTH OF FEBRUARY
There
are things I can say and there are things I cannot say. We saw a lot of increase and decrease. funny stunts and not so funny stunts. But still, February my birth month, and here is to Valentine
and the ten things we learnt this month:
1) President
Buhari Goes on Vacation
I must confess that
personally this does not surprise me. Since he was sworn in as president the
man has been going on vacation from one country to another. In fact it was only
between the month of December and January that he spent quality time in this
country; now business has resumed as usual and this time around it was
pronounced a vacation. Mr. President, I like you but you should learn that you
cannot affect positively the lives of Nigerians by living in the Diaspora. I
however will not fail to commend you for demonstrating obedience to the rule of
law by handing over to your vice while you are away. It shows that you are not
power thirsty and that is very commendable. But please, no more vacations.
2) Soak-a-Cash Pit
One
part of every home that people disgust a lot because of its content is the soak-away
pit. But not the house of the former chief of air staff Gen. Adesola Amosu. This
fine general has been under investigation since November for fraud of over 10
NAF contracts totaling over $930 million. About N3 billion was traced to his
wife’s account but on ransacking his house, the EFCC discovered a freshly dug
soak-away pit which contained a vast sum of $1 million. The General and his wife
have been arrested and would have a difficult time in explaining how the
excreta of their family miraculously turned into cash. But I keep asking myself
what led the EFCC to a soak-away pit? Anyway shaa, let them keep the flag
flying; in this our epic battle against corruption, good will stampede evil and
eventually bring all who looted us to the grounds to book. In the meantime, the
General can join the colonel and the spokesman behind bars.
3) Hawking to the Limelight
There
are lots of ways of becoming a celebrity in this country but hawking your way
to stardom is legendary. Olajumoke Orisaguna is fast becoming a household name in
Nigeria as a testimony, but less than a month ago she was just an Agege bread
seller who had left her family in Osun state in search of greener pastures in
Lagos. Luck smiled on her as she photo bombed TY bello’s photo shoot with Tinie
Tempah. That was how fame and reformation knocked on her door.
For
all the long story there are lots of morals to learn from Jumoke’s story, the
simplest of them being for you to keep doing what you do best no matter how bad
or demeaning it might be and be sure that one day love will smile on you; yea I
just wrote love and not luck its February baby. If you think I am lying then
ask rat poison sellers in Nigeria how their story changed in January this year.
4) Showbiz Brawl Heats Up
For
a while I started to think that our Nigerian celebrities have become so
conscious of their public appeal but happenings in 2016 have proved otherwise.
It started with the Olamide and Donjazzy’s Headies brouhaha. Then the beautiful
unscripted episode between the quads of Davido, his baby mama, his baby girl
and Dele Momodu, to the point that Davido had to do a song with Humblesmith for
the people he claimed were crowding his space.
I
thought that was it, before Wizkid showed us that he was far from the forgiving
type when he dissed Linda Ikeji on his instagram page; he said “almost 40,
lonely and bitter! Prayers up for you” Now a statement like that can make any
woman cry. Also, the P-square brothers reminded us that they were still alive
when Peter went on a mad rant on instagram demanding that their manager should
be fired and stating clearly that he was tired of family business. Hmm, Paul
backed their elder brother sharperly, and we are keeping our fingers crossed to
see how this family drama unfolds.
But
for the news of Mabel Makun leaving her matrimonial home, I might not be
publishing this. They always looked so happy on the outside, showing off and
throwing lavish birthday parties. Only recently was it revealed that AY was a
wife beater. I hope they can settle; would hate to see the marriage break up.
But long may the controversies coming from our celebrities live, the
entertainment it gives me compares to no other, not their songs, jokes, or
acting prowess. So I hope it stays this way all year long.
5) Where Does Power Lie? Ask Gov. Okorocha
I
took sometime perusing through the dictionary in search of a word to qualify
the Imo state governor, and then I came across the word ‘Hubris’. This man
visibly over estimated his power or grossly under estimated the power of
organized labor. I remember asking the necessary body to take serious action
against the Imo state government in my last edition and they did not disappoint.
Imo state was shut down for more than a week, even the banks joined the protest
and the beauty of it all was that the protest was taken directly to the Douglas
house. That means Okorocha was grounded in his own residence, no entrance and
no exit. That was when his better sense spoke to him and he rescinded the sack
of 3000 workers who he once called indolent and redundant.
I
know there is serious hardship in Imo state now, even pure water was sold for
as high as N20 at one point. But the masses have made a statement of intent and
if you see Gov. Okorocha please ask him, where does power lie?
6) Dollar Palava
The
down trend of naira against the dollar started as far back as the last quarter
of 2014 when the CBN devalued the naira. But in this February it has hit an all-time
low. The dollar traded for as low as N425 to the naira. Who is the incidence of
this increase falling on if not the poor masses? All thanks to Nigeria, a
country that imports what it has and exports what it does not have. Senator
common sense started a commendable trend to buy the naira and then hit us with
komkom when we found that his book was not published in the country. Where is
the common sense in that?
Petty
traders whose commodities have no business with the dollar now use this medium
as a means to exploit people. My neighbor graciously gave me soup on a day that
found me hungry. With gratitude in my heart, I walked down to a small kiosk to
buy fufu when the owner who is just shy of 70 years said to me “ Nwa m, one
wrap is N50, dollar tinyere ego”, I nearly collapsed, wetin concern fufu
concern dollar again? We shall survive this as always.
7) Black Monday: FG Rings the Sack
On
the 15th of February, when most people were still hung over from
their celebration of love the previous day, President Buhari showed that
Valentine was not applicable to governance in Nigeria when he relieved 26
Director General of different government parastatals of their duties with
immediate effect. He as well gave the Vice Chancellors of some universities
their marching orders. Hmm, maybe mummy Aisha failed in her Valentine duties
the day before.
Anyways,
DG’s of parastatals are just like Ministers and it is the responsibility of the
president to appoint or relieve them of their duties with their entitlements
though, but what surprises me is how you relieve 13 vice Chancellors of their
duties. The Universities have an autonomy act, and as such the ministry of
Education have no right to sack VC’s. Since then, a petition has been written
to the Nigerian senate, among their grievances includes the fact that 8 friends
of the minister and president were appointed to take over the vacant seats in
this institutions. We as well have seen thousands of civil service group
members block the National Assembly and we are still watching to see how this
story we end. VC’s are elected by school councils for a particular tenure in
office not appointed, Adamu Adamu; I hope you are listening.
8) The Curios Case of Sunday Oliseh
If
there is anyone you associate with controversy, it has to be the immediate past
coach of the Super Eagles. He was captain of the national team but missed the
2002 world cup because of his indiscipline, then he infamously punched a team
mate in his then club side Borussia Dortmund leading to indefinite suspension
from the club. I had my reservations when he took over as the head coach of the
super eagles and those reservations have turned out to be true.
He
first led to the unceremonious retirement of two of our trusted Stalwarts,
Vincent Enyeama and Emmanuel Emenike, then shamefully crashed out CHAN and went
on a mad rant accusing the NFF for his shortcomings, and just recently he
resigned honorably citing unpaid salaries, match allowances and bonuses.
Resigning
was the best decision he made not because of the unpaid allowances but because
our national team hit a new performance low under his watch and he would have
been sacked either way. I mean under his administration was the first time I
totally lost interest in watching the super eagles. Good that he is gone, I
know he might have imagined that Siasia, Amodu, Lagerback, Keshi did not have a
clue of what they were doing, now he knows better that it always looks rosy on
the outside.
9) EFCC: Hunting Spree Continues
It
is funny how most of our former politicians and public office holders, the men
who wielded so much power in this country, have turned into the proverbial bush
meat. We kicked off the month with the case of Sambo Dasuki and Olisah Metuh
fresh in our minds, then the EFCC sweetened it up by pulling in some powerful
military officials including General Alex Badeh, Gen Wiwa, Air marshal Adesola
Amosu, Air marshal Adigun with Commodore Gbadegbo. The last we heard, the
properties of these men running into billions of naira have been sealed off
pending the return of their share in the Dasuki gate.
Elsewhere,
Uche Secondus, the immediate former acting chairman of PDP was arrested.
Secondus is the second PDP bigwig to get into the EFCC radar after Metuh’s case
died down a little. At this rate even oga Jonah should be careful because we
don’t know who is next.
Tom
Polo’s case is a matter for another day, the man knows why he is still running
away from reporting to the EFCC, if he ever gets there his story might not
finish in 10 years. On the exact opposite Mr. Chidi Amamgbo, Deziani’s Cousin
tried to prove he had no skeletons and gladly walked into the EFCC den, he was
gladly detained and gladly asked how he acquired billions of dollars from shady
deals during the four years the cousin was gladly oil minister. Let’s not
forget that Allison Madueke himself was called in by the EFCC as part of
investigation into the wife’s stewardship in the oil industry.
Abba
Moro, the former minister of interior who crookedly advertised an immigration
job back in 2014, duped Nigerian youths and led to a stampede in what
ultimately caused the death of about 50 bright Nigerian youths, has been
finally arrested by the EFCC to answer for his crimes. He is most important in
this list and a man like him would have a hard time finding forgiveness whether
it’s from God or Allah. In the mean time we the Nigerian youths are hoping for
a speedy trial and immediate conviction of this horrible criminal.
10) Where Do We Go From Here
February
is a month where love is celebrated but in reality for Nigerians, there was
nothing to love about this February. Prices of goods are skyrocketing at an
alarming level, pure water which was once the most affordable thing in this
country now sells at N20 in some places. Everyone in this country now has
dollar in their mouth especially the food sellers. Petrol has somehow managed
to get back to N115 per liter. Things are hard but yet our politicians are
hiding money in soak-away pits. The situation of this country has led to a
social media campaign by most of our youths to bring back corruption. It is a
pity that it seems all we need now is the social media to get the government
working again.
Students
in our schools are turning into cannibals, just recently a girl in FUTO did a
Luis Suarez on another girl. Unfortunately, she became more successful than the
Barcelona front man and bit off the nose of the other. Naija men seem to have
upgraded their security system, on two separate occasions this month I heard
cases of a man being glued to another man’s wife after sex, how these men
manage to secure their wives I can’t explain. On other related story, a lady
named Chizoba who claimed to be Rev. Kings personal maid and one of the ladies
he set ablaze in the name of cleansing have come out to tell us that she served
the self-acclaimed man of God for 7 years stark naked, with neither pants nor
bra; on a normal day I would point accusing fingers at Mr. King but this time I
am really asking if she is sane. Ok oo, we are still waiting for the Nigerian
government to carry out the death sentence on the man.
In
the meantime there are speculations here and there that God has shifted the
position of hell closer to Nigeria. This is heightened by the fact that the
hotness of our weather cannot only be attributed to the sun, people don’t sleep
well again even under air conditioners. Anyways, a cooling van might do the
magic.
From
the concerned citizens of this country, we are calling on President Muhammadu
Buhari to please spend some time in this nation and figure out the way forward.
We are as well now also in doubt of the competency of our big madam Kemi
Adeosun. How she will manage our finance in this country if she believes 16 + 6
= 24. I just hope it was a slip of the teeth.
I
bring to your notice that as we are about to enter the 3rd month of the year, our national budget is yet to be approved. Saraki and co. please
do the necessary. Till we meet again next month I hope you are asking the
question am asking; “where do we go from here?” Have a nice month as we pray to
the good man in heaven to send down the rain.
Dubie
Val.
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